Artisan Crafted Air
Heather's mom is in town this weekend, and to celebrate, my parents took us out ot Alexander's Steakhouse. Alexander's is one of the most upscale restaurants I've ever been to; they had a few really expensive steaks ($250), and they had caviar for five hundred bucks. HUH? That's the price of a scooter!
Needless to say, we stuck with the food in the double-digit range. The steaks were really good, and everything else was fantastic and intriguing, honestly. They gave us cotton candy for dessert.
Alexander's gets 4 points on the Pretentio-meter for the following infractions:
1) TABLESIDE PREP - Mom ordered roasted red pepper soup, which came with shrimp. The server poured the soup on the shrimp at the table. This ain't Benihana's, people. If you are gonna show me how you make the food, at least make it interesting. Put it in an onion volcano or flip it into your hat.
2) UNCUT SALAD - This wasn't even a wedge salad, but rather stalks of romaine (maybe?) laid parallel with all the Caesar accoutrements on top. I guess I'm okay with the wedge salad because of the presentation points it earns. This just seemed lazy though.
3) STUPID NOMENCLATURE - "Brown Butter Frozen Air" was an ingredient in one of the desserts. Apparently it's froth. They could have said "Froth" but they said "Frozen Air." "Froth." They could have just said "froth." They didn't.
4) ARTISTRY - There was also "artisan cheese" on the dessert menu. Unless Michaelangelo himself carved the cheese into the shape of a Roman soldier, please don't call it artisan. It's cheese--it came out of a cow's udder and it curdled and now I'm putting it in my mouth and it's getting digested.
Despite these minor minor gripes, the food was great, and service was spectacular. Here's my recommendation: "I recommend it if you can expense it."
I need to start writing about something besides food.
Needless to say, we stuck with the food in the double-digit range. The steaks were really good, and everything else was fantastic and intriguing, honestly. They gave us cotton candy for dessert.
Alexander's gets 4 points on the Pretentio-meter for the following infractions:
1) TABLESIDE PREP - Mom ordered roasted red pepper soup, which came with shrimp. The server poured the soup on the shrimp at the table. This ain't Benihana's, people. If you are gonna show me how you make the food, at least make it interesting. Put it in an onion volcano or flip it into your hat.
2) UNCUT SALAD - This wasn't even a wedge salad, but rather stalks of romaine (maybe?) laid parallel with all the Caesar accoutrements on top. I guess I'm okay with the wedge salad because of the presentation points it earns. This just seemed lazy though.
3) STUPID NOMENCLATURE - "Brown Butter Frozen Air" was an ingredient in one of the desserts. Apparently it's froth. They could have said "Froth" but they said "Frozen Air." "Froth." They could have just said "froth." They didn't.
4) ARTISTRY - There was also "artisan cheese" on the dessert menu. Unless Michaelangelo himself carved the cheese into the shape of a Roman soldier, please don't call it artisan. It's cheese--it came out of a cow's udder and it curdled and now I'm putting it in my mouth and it's getting digested.
Despite these minor minor gripes, the food was great, and service was spectacular. Here's my recommendation: "I recommend it if you can expense it."
I need to start writing about something besides food.
Labels: food, pretension, restaurant, review, words
posted by Andrew at
12:47 AM
1 Comments:
We went to a place like that for my parents 25th wedding anniversary. The salad was exactly was you described... and my dad scarfed them down like he was eating a burrito. Ya know, with his hand, gnawing and everything. And my parents have money, this isn't like Howdy Doody goes to the city.
Then, they served us butter cut in triangles with little olives around it. I wasn't aware that butter needed garnish? I thought it was supposed to be scooped with an ice cream scoop and thrown into a paper cup.
Okay, maybe we are Howdy Doody goes to the city.
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